Saturday, July 11, 2009

Dirty Laundry

Ste and I have been discussing lately.

Discussing is an adorable way to say arguing.

Here's my side [the right side] of the fight, I mean, discussion:

I'm at a time in my life when my children are too young to adequately (or they're unwilling to) help around the house and, to finish off the double-edged sword, they're also at that age when they seem to make the largest of messes (Olivia!).

To top it off, my husband has, ahem, removed himself one degree further (he' in the 'ric, now) and I'm doing stuff like mowing/edging the yard & taking out the trash (I feel like I'm one step away from scratching myself inappropriately - and I can't even say stuff like that anymore 'cause I'm married to someone in the 'ric).


Anyway, I thought that during the summer, when my kids are around an extra 8 hours a day to destroy my house, it would be nice to have someone help out once every 3-4 weeks.

Here's his side of the "discussion":
  1. It's not in the budget.
  2. It's not going to only last during the summer (he knows my addictive tendencies).
  3. Our house is small enough that you can clean the toilet and vacuum the stairs at the same time. AND if I want a house that's not as small, we need to cut back on splurges, which brings us back to reason #1.
So, go ahead.
But only if you're going to validate my needs.


Randi said...

That is too funny! I am on the phone with Gina right now, and we are talking about the same D$%n thing!

Maybe we need to have a summer Stay-at-home mom support group/ GNO!!

Call Us, we can complain together over some really greasy food! I find that always helps....!

Lindy said...

A couple of months ago I taught Abbi to clean toilets. I bought her own toilet brush and made a big deal about it and she was so excited. Now the newness has worn off, but she gets offended if we even mention cleaning the toilets without her. Once trained properly kids can really do a good job. Lily does the bathroom counters and they all love to do the mirrors.

Merilee Boyack has a great philosophy towards kids helping. I have her book "The Parenting Breakthrough" and her CD "Teaching Your Kids to Fly" and they have been great resources.

But really, if Steven doesn't want to hire someone he should evaluate whether he is really helping as much as he could. I know that is personal and I have no idea ... but sometimes it is easy to lag in the home when things are crazy other places.

Shelley said...

GNO...let me know when!

Mindy, I told you trade, trade, trade!!! You have a neighbor that cleans houses, she has kids, they need to learn the piano...voila! If that doesn't work, back pay for all the babysitting you have "generously" done for her. :)

Anonymous said...

I've got the perfect solution.

Use 2% of your income for lawn mowing and house cleaning and other expenses.

Now the best part. That 2% comes from your tithing. You still pay 8% so you don't feel too guilty and he's no longer allowed in the 'ric so he can help out more too.

or you could just make sure you loose the most weight and use that money for housekeeping.

Jessi said...

When I was pregnant with Chloe last summer we hired someone to come in and clean the bathrooms and kitchen twice a month. She was my life-saver. There were times I seriously wanted to kiss her. Sadly, I had to let her go because it REALLY wasn't in the budget. But I dream of the day I can have some "help."

Katie Evans Photography said...

You make me laugh out loud. :)

I find that if you go help someone else out and find that thier situation is even worse than yours it makes you feel better about your own situation.

So what do ya say...wanna come clean my bathrooms and make yourself feel better? :)

Mormon Bachelor Pad said...

I would pay real money to watch you vacuum and clean the toilet at the same time...

Emma said...

Siding w/ Ste right now. My kids help out, or there's no computer or TV. But that's just my opinion. Good luck!

Heidi Kjar said...

Its funny cause I always hear that about when men get put in busy callings in the church...well...
they kind of get a little too busy for the home responsibilites! Sad, but true! I know your hubby is going to hate me for this, but I TOTALLY think you should get someone to help out once a month. Your life sounds very busy
(3 kids and a hubby in the 'ric as you call it:)! Whenever I talk to my mom about expenses that Jer thinks are "unnecessary":), my mom says to tell him:
"it's a lot less expensive for this (in your case the cleaning lady) then the prozac and counseling are going to be in the future!" And sad enough there are tons of women who feel they have to DO IT ALL and then end up losing everything cause they are so worn out!! This is Heidi on her soap box:). Good luck trying to convince him!

Anonymous said...

Having had a husband in the 'ric more years than I can count...It isn't an excuse for inactivity..... He may be busy but undoubtedly less so than EQP....Do I need to call him and remind him he needs to take out the trash etc? And getting help in the house is a must. Re-evaluate the budget (or throw it out) I have had Shellie for three hours every two weeks forever. They still had to clean up their rooms before she came...(remind me to tell you the funny story about "the maid is coming, mom, I don't need to clean up) and everyone still had chores in between ..but once every two weeks I knew I could come home to a clean smelling house which really helped my attitude if you know what I mean. It was worth every penny. When we made up our "retirement" can be sure I fought to keep Shellie......I also snuck in a lawnboy although Paul thinks it is a reflection on his manhood.....
love y'all

Tara said...

Ah, this is a great topic to discuss! I need so much help myself...I'm going to lose it, really. But like Susannah told me, "Just plan on the house being a disaster all summer, and once school starts back up, it'll be okay." Six more weeks.

Steven said...

Wow. I had no idea that so many people would be disappointed in me in so little time. You are a tough crowd to please. No one asked how much time Mindy likes to watch So You Think You Can Dance...ooh, now what's up!

Amy Johnson said...

I'm a working mom and oh what I would pay for someone to clean my house!!! I would rather save my money though and invest in the Jetsons Robot Maid. No judging, no criticizing, and I can store it in the closet till I need it! On the serious side though....Simon is only 3 and he has a chore chart. He loves it! Yes, it doesn't get done right and I have to re do most of his chores...but I think of it as an investment of my time because in a couple years he will be perfectly trained! Please don't hold me to that! :)

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